My First Baby

I had just married the most amazing and loving man I’d ever met. We enjoyed our time together - laughing, experiencing the world together and planning our future. As I had always dreamed of having a family some day, I knew that creating new life with this man would be the most perfect manifestation of our love and commitment to one another.

We were living in his bustling metropolis. The birth control I’d been on was going to run out soon. I was terrified about seeking out a new provider or clinic in our community. So - I got pregnant about 3 weeks after the wedding. I was terrified and delighted at the same time. My grandma and her friend were visiting us for a few days, while I held on quietly to my growing suspicions…

I knew my mother expected me to have ambitions about becoming a professional as soon as I graduated from college. What would she say if I was going to have a baby and be so completely in love with it that I would never leave him or her to pursue a career? My new husband - we reveled in each other and spending every moment together that we could, but how would he respond to becoming a father?

Well, I finished my college coursework within a few months. We made plans to move closer to my mother and stepfather - where life was less expensive. I imagine that my in-laws were devastated. We were going to have a baby, and see if we could figure out how to live on one income!

I still, to this day, do not remember how or when I’d first heard of midwives, but did know that that was the kind of care I wanted for this pregnancy. I found a great group associated with our local university. We began to plan for baby’s arrival, took the childbirth education class and I sewed things for the nursery.

Our baby son’s due date was 6/16. The day came and went. I began to “go mental” with “pregnancy brain”. Nine months is NOT the normal length of gestation; it is 40-42 weeks - which divided by 4 weeks/month = 10 months of pregnancy. I had been “hoodwinked”.

Seven days past my EDD we were in the hospital for an induction of labor. Pitocin did its trick over the course of a couple of days. The epidural became absolutely necessary to save me from the “Mack Truck Effect”. I pushed my baby into the world @ 3:35 on a Friday afternoon. Woohoo! He was beautiful and perfect! We were in love, and no three people have ever lived who could have treasured each other more.

I had decided years before that breastfeeding and cloth diapering would be the right way to go for us. Most of how I wanted to mother my baby was very different from how my mother had raised me; I would have to write my own script - and I did not mind a bit. I even threw out the protocol for nursing the newborn no more than 15 minutes per side by day 2. My baby wanted to be held and snuggled all the time, and that was just fine with me.

Now that baby is 33 years old. He is expecting his own child in a few weeks. The story begins all over again…